Thursday, March 5, 2009
SIDE NOTE....
So after reading my blog last night (don't act like you don't re-read the blogs you write)...I realized 1. it sounded like I am more annoyed with A then I am in love with her and 2. I always end by saying something gooey about my boys. Let me explain...my love for my daughter goes far beyond words can express. She amazes me on a daily basis in the things she picks up on and the love she has for us, especially her brother. We are lucky to have her and I couldn't imagine life without her...I would never want too. When she was a baby (like baby baby) she experienced something I would have never wished upon her or dave and I for that matter....she wasn't aware of the situation (don't need to go into details, most of you know what I am talking about).....however, it was something that would have changed her life forever....that is about the time I found out I was pregnant with G and life got that much harder on me...mentally and physically...I was DEPRESSED...scary depressed...and it has taken me a long time to admit it....but, just so everyone knows, HER LITTLE FACE is what made me keep going on a daily bases...she is what I had to get up for...there was a lot of time I had to rely on dave's family for help with her and I had a really hard time with it. Many people judged me as being a bad mom not knowing the full extent of the situation....I felt like a bad mom...I didn't know how to handle loneliness and pregnancy and being a mommy all in one. When the bomb was dropped on us after G's birth...honestly, they first thing I said to my mom and dave through all our tears was "what about A? How is this going to effect her life?" G has changed our lives, he has made me a better person, a better mom...but, A made me a mom...she is my first born, she is my cuddle monkey....she is and always will be my ANGEL...she carried me during some of the hardest times in my life and she will continue to do so. Even though she can drive me up the wall...that little girl makes life fun, makes it worth living and I wouldn't change her little attitude for anything!!!!
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1 comment:
I honestly didn't think you were saying anything that bad. She is what? 1 and a half? That's the age, moms have to gripe about that stuff. Of course they do way cute things, but it's hard when they do the frustrating things which is why we have to talk about it. If I didn't I would go crazy. Miley does the cutest things ever and she is my best friend. I spend my whole day with her and I love it. I am so lucky. My comment on your last post probably made it seem like I thought you were not enjoying it or whatever. But just so you know that is not what I got out of it. And just so you know too I love my little angel she is my life!
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