I THINK I CAN, I THINK I CAN, I THINK I CAN...I HOPE..

Last night was by far one of the longest nights to date since the birth of our boy. As soon as I got him to sleep and had just settled into a snooze myself, I was woken up by a screaming, coughing, choking, little man. This went on till 6:30 this morning, with me watching over him like a hawk...I am not going to lie my patience by 4:30 was wearing thin...but, then he would snuggle into me and it was like I got a shock of energy for a few min. (PS our cable sucks,but, I learned a lot of new ideas from the circuit infomercial that channel 20 repeated for two hours) I am living off an hour and a half of sleep today and trying so hard not to be short with A (I was not so successful at that task with dave this morning, sorry babe). I did learn if you get a spurt of energy during such a mood to capitalize on it...I fed a lunch, did dishes, fed g, did laundry, put a down for a nap and then all but collapsed on my couch to do what..blog of course. I have now officially caught whatever g has, I don't know how my parents did it, I don't ever remember them catching any bug when my brother and I had it...Mom, Dad, some pointers here? Catching the same thing however, I feel even worse for him...now, I know how he feels, minus the smokers cough that has yet to detach itself from his little lungs. I had someone ask me today how and why I blog so much...well, for one all of my family lives far away and they often comment on how they can keep track of us through my blogs and two, I enjoy it and its my escape....so there that is why I try to take 30 min out of my day to at least do one post...even if its just pictures or non-sense. Anyway, I don't want people to leave a comment on how motherhood is hard and to just deal with the sickness...if that is what you are thinking while reading this, remember I have had two kids in two years and all though I am not an expert by any means, I have a pretty good idea of how hard motherhood can be. I am not writing this to complain, I don't mind the sleepless nights (ok I do, but, its a part of having kids), I don't mind the sick kids, I am glad I have no one here that I can have watch my kids when I need a break...it forces me to suck it up and has taught me I can do it....I AM WRITING THIS RANT BECAUSE I WANT MY SON TO BE HEALTHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want him to know what its like to have at least 2 months without having to be on some sort of med or visit some doctor...I don't want to have to worry, like I told Kenzie (thanks for offering to help, just that made me feel better), I can handle everything, but, the worrying...I honestly feel like it has taken me over...I love this kid more than I ever thought possible and I want him to be a happy (well he always is), HEALTHY, bouncing, baby boy!!!!!! (end of rant, have a good day everyone)